The Buck Stops Here: Taking Personal Responsibility For A Happier Life by Krissy Jackson

Have you ever paused to reflect how, in life, when you have taken total responsibility for something, it got done?

It may have been something small. Planning a party perhaps. Or cleaning out a messy old room.
At other times it was larger. Completing an important project at work. Being there for a friend who needed help at a critical time. It might even have been a major life issue. Raising a child. Moving to a new city.

No matter what it was, the moment you decided to take full responsibility and made the commitment to do it, there was no doubt in your mind that you would succeed. And sure enough, you did it.

Likewise, I'm sure you can remember a time or two where neither you nor anyone else took responsibility for something that you wanted to achieve. Naturally it never happened, of course, because no one took responsibility! The examples will be different for each of us, but the principle remains the same: When no one takes responsibility for an idea, it remains just that... an idea.

So how does this apply to our lives and ultimately our happiness?

Have you ever gone through a difficult time in your life? A period when you felt helpless and powerless to deal with your circumstances and destiny? We all have. I'm sure many of us have experienced the heartbreak of broken relationships, the uncertainty resulting from the loss of a job, or the sadness of the loss of a loved one.

The easiest thing to do in times like these is to blame other people or circumstances for your life, your state of mind, your finances and career. For example, it's so easy to blame a broken relationship for destroying your ability to love again.

But blame is a very disempowering emotion. It places on others the responsibility for your life, your emotions, your self.

Looking back at the moments when you accepted responsibility for a task and ultimately achieved it and compare it to those other moments when no one took responsibility and nothing was achieved ... you begin to appreciate the dramatic power of that one single act of taking total responsibility.

So you have a problem and you have a good excuse for living with it, right? You're...
unappreciated...
misunderstood...
your parents raised you wrong...
the school didn't teach you the right thing...
the system is against you...
you're broke...
unemployed...
you can't do anything right...
you made a lot of mistakes...
... the list goes on and on. And there's nothing you can do about it because you are:
too young
too old
under-educated
over-qualified
overweight
not pretty enough
too beautiful
you won't conform
you're a pushover
you don't have any money.

Just take your pick of cookie cutter excuses and explanations to avoid taking responsibility and continue playing the victim. You know you do it - we've all done it! It's much easier to blame others. Playing the victim gives us something we crave - attention... because many women confuse attention with love. Blaming makes us feel better, but it does not solve problems. And something even worse happens: when we allow someone or something else to become responsible for us, we give up our personal power. The power to make decisions about our own lives, and to control our destiny. Are you willing to take that kind of chance with your life?
You are responsible for deciding who you are and for choosing any future paths you take in your life.

You cannot change people or circumstances. The only thing you can change is yourself and the way you react to the challenges in your life. Some people go through their lives blaming others, living out their days in endless hopelessness and despair. But, with the exception of child abuse or losing someone you love, no one can do anything to you that you do not give them the permission to do. Did you catch that - I'll repeat it again because it's so important:

No one can do anything to you that you do not give them the permission to do.

I'll be the first to admit that it takes a lot of courage to accept that you're the way you are because of the choices you've made in your life. But it can be very empowering indeed.

The simple act of taking responsibility for yourself and your life is the first step towards picking up the pieces and moving on. When you shift the onus of change to yourself, the constraints of the past are lifted and you can be anything you choose to be.

And just like when you set your mind to complete a task and fully committed to achieving it, you will succeed at healing yourself from the inside out.

True empowerment starts from within. It comes from your willingness to be responsible for what is happening to you, your life and your world. At some point in our lives we all face adversity. Some of us blame others, while others see their own responsibility and get on with their lives. The way we deal with our pain and let it transform us, makes the difference between winning and losing the battle.

In Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, T. Harv Eker wrote something very profound which I've modified to apply it to your personal lives and written it for you here:

It's time to decide. You can be a viction or you can be happy, but you can't be both. Listen up! Every time, and I mean every time, you blame, justify, or complain, you are slitting your throat. Sure it would be nice to use a kinder and gentler metaphor, but forget it. I'm not interested in kind or gentle right now. I'm interested in helping you see exactly what the heck you're doing to yourself!

It's time to take back your power and acknowledge that you create everything that is in your life and everything that is not in it. Realize that you create your happniess, your despair, and every level in between.

When you take responsibility for your own life and your own actions and act to transform your life from within is when you are truly become the master of your own destiny.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. It's not so much what happens to you in life, but how you handle it... how you respond. Don't waste any more time playing the blame game. The buck stops with you. You CAN be happy... if only you would choose to be.

Be happy now.

by Krissy Jackson http://www.ksyltoday.com

How to Speak Your Way to Success - Jack Canfield

In order to be successful, we must first define what success means to us; and that means getting clear about what you want, writing it down, and thinking big!

If you are going to be successful in creating the life of your dreams, you have to believe that you are capable of making it happen. You have to believe you have the right stuff, that you are able to pull it off.

You have to believe in yourself. Whether you call it self-esteem, self-confidence, or self-assurance, it is a deep-seated belief that you have what it takes - the abilities, inner resources, talents, and skills to create your desired results.

Ultimately, you must learn to control your self-talk, eliminate any negative and limiting beliefs, and maintain a constant state of positive expectations.

Control Your Self-Talk...
Researchers have found that the average person thinks as many as 50,000 thoughts a day. Sadly, many of those thoughts are negative - I’m not managemen`t material... I’ll never lose weight... It doesn’t matter what I do, nothing ever works out for me.

This is what psychologists call victim language. Victim language actually keeps you in a victim state of mind. It is a form of self-hypnosis that lulls you into a belief that you are unlovable and incompetent.

In order to get what you want from life, you need to give up this victim language and start talking to yourself like a winner - I can do it... I know there is a solution... I am smart enough and strong enough to figure this out... Everything I eat helps me maintain my perfect body weight.

You Are Always Programming Your Subconscious Mind... Your subconscious mind is like the crew of a ship. You are its captain. It is your job to give the crew orders. And when you do this, the crew takes everything you say literally.

The crew (your subconscious) has no sense of humor. It just blindly follows orders. When you say, “Everything I eat goes straight to my hips,” the crew hears that as an order: Take everything she eats, turn it into fat and put it on her hips.

On the other hand, if you say, “Everything I eat helps me maintain my perfect body weight,” the crew will begin to make that into reality by helping you make better food choices, exercise and maintain the right metabolism rate for your body.

This power of your subconscious mind is the reason you must become very vigilant and pay careful attention to your spoken and internal statements.

Unfortunately, most people don’t realize they are committing negative self-talk, which is why it is best to enlist another person - your success partner - in monitoring each other’s speaking. You can have a signal for interrupting each other when you use victim language.

Use Affirmations to Build Self-Confidence... One of the most powerful tools for building worthiness and self-confidence is the repetition of positive statements until they become a natural part of the way you think.

These “affirmations” act to crowd out and replace the negative orders you have been sending your crew (your subconscious mind) all these years. I suggest that you create a list of 10 to 20 statements that affirm your belief in your worthiness and your ability to create the life of your dreams.

Of course, what to believe is up to you, but here are some examples of affirmations that have worked for others in the past:
I am worthy of love, joy and success.
I am smart and make wise choices
I am loveable and capable.
I can create anything I want.
I am able to solve any problem that comes my way.
I can handle anything that life hands me.
I have all the energy I need to do everything I want to do.
I am attracting all the right people into my life

Believing in Yourself is an Attitude...
Believing in yourself is a choice. It’s an attitude you develop over time. It’s now your responsibility to take charge of your own self-concept and your beliefs.

It might help to know that the latest brain research now indicates that with enough positive self-talk and positive visualization combined with the proper training, coaching, and practice, anyone can learn to do almost anything.

You must choose to believe that you can do anything you set your mind to - anything at all - because, in fact, you can!
___________
Jack Canfield, is the founder and co-creator of book brand
Chicken Soup for the Soul and a leading authority on Peak
Performance. If you’re ready to jump-start your life, make
more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do,
get your success tips from Jack Canfield now athttp://www.JackCanfield.com

To Get Ahead, Use Your Head

I’m the last person in the world who would tell you not to work hard. I’m also the first one to remind you that working hard must also be tempered by working smart, or you might just be wasting a load of effort. There is a reason why we were born with both muscles and brains.

Consider the story of two lumberjacks in a tree-cutting contest. Both were strong and determined, hoping to win the prize. But one was hardworking and ambitious, chopping down every tree in his path at the fastest pace possible, while the other appeared to be a little more laid back, methodically felling trees and pacing himself.

The go-getter worked all day, skipping his lunch break, expecting that his superior effort would be rewarded. His opponent, however, took an hour-long lunch, then resumed his steady pace. In the end, the eager beaver was dismayed to lose to his “lazier” competition.
Thinking he deserved to win after his hard work, he finally approached his opponent and said, “I just don’t understand. I worked longer and harder than you, and went hungry to get ahead. You took a break, and yet you still won.

It just doesn’t seem fair. Where did I go wrong?” The winner responded, “While I was taking my lunch break, I was sharpening my ax.”

Hard work will always pay off; smart work will pay better. Remember back in college, there were the kids who studied all day and all night, but still struggled to pass exams?
Then there were the kids who studied hard but also found time for a game of cards or basketball, and still aced every test.

Both groups studied the same material, attended the same lectures taught by the same professors, and took the same test. Was the second group just that much more brilliant?

Maybe, but my money’s on the way they approached their material and learned how to study. If they were smart, they applied those same principles after graduation: work hard, but work smart.

That’s a lesson that can be learned by even young children. A little girl visiting a watermelon farm asked the farmer how much a large watermelon cost. “Three dollars,” he told her. “But I only have thirty cents,” the little girl said.

The farmer looked around his field, and feeling sorry for the little girl, pointed at a small watermelon and said, “That one’s thirty cents.” “Oh good,” she replied as she paid him, “Just leave it on the vine and I’ll be back in a month to get it.”

Call it creativity, call it ingenuity, call it whatever: I call it using your head. Knowing how to analyze a situation and how to execute an action plan will put you ahead of the game in the long run.

There’s nothing wrong with having a leg up on your competition - it’s how you win. The combination of hard work and smart work is the formula for success.

Think about what needs to be done, and then think again about the best way to accomplish it - not necessarily the way you’ve always done it, or the fastest way, and certainly not the hardest way.

Never make work harder than it has to be. That’s just a colossal waste of time.
Perhaps the ingenuity award goes to the fellow who came to the Canadian border on his motorcycle, carrying two saddlebags strapped across his seat. The border guards asked the obvious question, “What’s in your saddlebags?” “Rocks,” was the reply.

So the guards emptied the bags to check out his story. Sure enough, all they found were rocks. So they sent him on his way. The next week, the same fellow came to the crossing, again on a motorcycle, again with the same payload.

The guards checked once again, and found more rocks. Off he went. The scene repeated itself weekly for several months, until finally the guards couldn’t stand it any longer. “We know you are smuggling something across the border, but every time we inspect your saddlebags we find only rocks.

Please tell us what you are up to, and we promise not to turn you in.” “Well,” the fellow replied, “It’s really very simple. I’m smuggling stolen motorcycles.”

Mackay’s Moral: It’s good to work hard. It’s great to work smart. But it’s best to work hard and smart.
___________
Written by Harvey Mackay—Brought to you by TSTN - The
Success Training Network. For more information on TSTN and
their world-renown faculty of success and achievement
thought leaders, go to http://www.getmotivation.com/qk.cgi/tstn

This is your year to success

This is one of the resources I recommend on my website.

Sign up on the year to success website and you will get one email every week day.

The topics are all various aspects of success.

Don't procrastinate - sign up now.

My “Top 10” List for Financial Success - Michelle Jones

You don’t have to be wealthy to be s\uccessful in my book, in fact, many of my most favorite people in this world have very little money at all.

However, I also believe it is important that we manage our money and
resources well, so that we can provide for our families and have more to
share with others...

Read the complete article here

The Four Emotions That Can Lead to Life Change

Excerpted from article by Jim Rohn

In his chapter in "101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life," Jim talks about four important emotions, one of which is "resolve."

He says the best definition for "resolve" he had ever heard came from a schoolgirl in CA. She said, "I think resolve means promising yourself you will never give up." Jim concurred. That is the best definition of resolve: promise yourself you’ll never give up.

He says, "Think about it! How long should a baby try to learn how to walk? How long would you give the average baby before you say, 'That’s it, you’ve had your chance'? You say that’s crazy? Of course it is. Any mother would say, 'My baby is going to keep trying until she learns how to walk!' No wonder everyone walks.

There is a vital lesson in this. Ask yourself, "How long am I going to work to make my dreams come true?" I suggest you answer, "As long as it takes."

That is the true definition of resolve.

To read about the other three emotions that can lead to life change and learn more inspiring, motivational and instructional tips like this one, check out the book "101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life."